Your cart is currently empty!
Category: Planning
-
Collegebound? What to Do in 10th Grade, Part 2
To read the earlier articles in this series, start here. Get your planning grid here.
Habit-Forming
Last week, we looked at ways your teen’s brain is changing, and talked about how to make the most of the opportunity. I also mentioned that lifelong habits—for better or worse—are created during this season of dramatic cognitive development. Wherever your teen spends a bulk of her time, neural pathways are created, connected, and hardened into place. Reversing those pathways at a later point will take effort. (What habits got their start during your early teens? Are they still with you?)
Here’s the Secret
To help your teen develop healthy habits and manage adolescent risk-taking and reward-seeking tendencies, increase responsibility. This is the second most important decision you make in 10th grade (IMHO). Remember, I’m speaking with 20/20 hindsight. I poured over a long list of potentially mission-critical decisions, and here’s where I landed.
Even though it probably feels like you should be singularly focused on academics, ramp up your sophomore’s level of responsibility first—and everything else important will eventually fall into place. Kids can always tackle an academic subject—don’t let some imaginary deadline make you feel that you must push, prod, and pull your teen through a traditional collegebound course load by the end of senior year.
Make It Easier on Yourself
What you want is maturity (currently, very countercultural). You can fuel that with more responsibility. Mature teens? They take responsibility for their academic achievement on their own.
This should make intuitive sense. Do you know someone whose life story includes an event they say caused them to grow up fast? Usually it means circumstances forced a load of responsibility on them at an early age. I think of my own father who left high school in the middle of his senior year to serve in World War 2—he was the most responsible person I’ve ever known, and the positive character traits forged in him through the war had a profound impact on his children and grandchildren.
He also was a lackluster student in high school, certainly not college material in anyone’s estimation. So, as he told it, he and his buddies were raring to go. Of course, they came back with very different perspectives. My dad then entered college on the GI Bill and ended up being the first in his family to earn a degree—he eventually completed two graduate degrees.
Try This
Thankfully, you don’t need a world war to help your teen grow up. There are plenty of other ways to up your teen’s responsibility quotient. Let his or her interests be a guide, as well as, your teen’s input.
- Find a job—not just any job. Look for one where your teen will have some decision-making opportunities and a decent amount of responsibility. Ideally, choose one that will help your teen figure out what his or her field of study might be following high school. My four kids all had jobs very early (we may or may not have run afoul of a few child labor laws). In hindsight, what I think was most valuable about each job is they were primarily surrounded by adults, not other teens, and this elevated the standard of maturity in those workplaces.
- Get some animals—pets, livestock, wildlife rescues—find some living things for your teen to care about and care for.
- Play competitive team sports—having others depend on your teen for the group’s success is a great context for building character and a healthy sense of obligation.
- Work with younger children—babysit, tutor, teach Sunday School, be a camp counselor, seize any opportunity where your teen must be the adult in the room.
- Volunteer—obviously. Helping others less fortunate is a great wake-up call for the naturally self-focused teen in the throes of early adolescence.
- Keep them busy. Not a direct line to more responsibility but my inside tip for keeping teens out of trouble. One reason my sons say they stayed in line during high school is they were dead tired at the end of the day. The fact that they were doing almost all the above, all the time may have something to do with that.
I bet your teens are doing many of these things already! Homeschooling naturally engenders responsibility in kids. I hope this post helps you see the natural duties you expect of your teen as part of your family are also part of the best way to get your collegebound kid college-ready.
-
Homeschool for Success: High School Planning Grid
Use this planning grid to map out a high school homeschool program that ticks all the boxes.
I learned a nifty strategy from my kids’ math program one year: Work backwards. Since then, it’s become a life mantra. Want to end up in a happy career? Start at the end and figure out each of the necessary preceding steps along the way, one by one. Want to end up with a college-ready senior? Plan the senior year first, then the junior year, and so forth all the way back to 8th grade. This strategy will help you make sure you don’t skip something important and ensure you allow adequate time for the priorities.
Your high school plan will get revised many times, but keeping the current draft front and center will help you and your collegebound kid say no to opportunities not on the pathway. (A common pitfall is trying to do too many things during high school instead of a few things really well.)
I created a planning grid when I wrote the Ultimate Guide to Homeschooling Teens and a copy of it also appears in the appendix of The Ultimate Homeschool Planner I created for Apologia.
Download a blank planning grid here.
Download a sample high school plan for a competitive scholarship candidate here.
Collegebound homeschooler? Checklist of classes, tests, and experiences by graduation.
-
Is It Me? My Child? Or the Curriculum? What to do when homeschooling frustrations abound
On to curriculum! In this final post in our series, Deb Bell helps this homeschooling mama learn to let go of unchecked boxes, and embrace the learning lifestyle—flaws and all.
Heather Eades: So if you have determined your curriculum is the culprit of your homeschool’s frustrations, what would you suggest?
Deb Bell: First adapt. I adapted every piece of curriculum I ever used. I slowed it down, sped it up; if it was tedious, we did every other problem. Don’t be afraid to change the assignment. I do not subscribe to the philosophy that you have to be “thorough.” I believe in a spiraling pedagogy, and that over time with repeated exposure and different contexts, students will get there. It’s perfectly fine to skip stuff and adjust; modify assignments–read a different book! Curriculum is a tool. Don’t let it enslave you.
HE: While many of us know that makes total sense to hear, I have countless homeschooling friends who have told me they just can’t handle it if all the boxes aren’t checked. Any advice for us Type A personalities?
DB: Most homeschooling parents are simply trying to do right by their children. They feel they are shortchanging their child if they don’t do everything, or that they’re being a lazy homeschooling parent. But the vast majority of homeschooling parents just need to understand that they can be more relaxed in their approach, and that God is in the details.
For Christian homeschoolers, the main reason to homeschool is so God can show you His faithfulness and His abundant provision. God has already accounted for our mess-ups, failures, and limitations. Make God a big part of this whole evaluation, and show your kids it’s OK to make mistakes, even though we all try to do the best we can. It’s the wrong emphasis for a parent to think, “Homeschooling is something I’m doing to my children,” rather than supporting their child in their own quest for knowledge and understanding, and gaining competencies; figuring out what God wants them to do with their life. Support those things. Boxes can go unchecked.
HE: Was there ever a time when you completely abandoned a curriculum completely mid-year?
DB: Yes, one of my children was part of a co-op using a math program that was not a good fit for the child’s learning style. It wasn’t that my child was being over-challenged as much as the child was frustrated and confused by the way the material was presented. If you realize you can’t change the content or coach the child through it to make gains, you know it is time to make a change.
HE: How does a parent determine if a curriculum or philosophy does not fit their child’s learning style?
DB: Be“student- centered.” Focused on the child, not the curriculum. It’s the homeschooling parent who is actually learning how their child learns—they become a student of the student. If your child struggles continuously in a school subject and you see they are putting in a lot of effort and have the desire to learn, yet they’re not making gains, make changes. Every child is uniquely designed by God. Your child’s cognitive growth is just as unique as your child’s physical development. We need to normalize differences in our children’s cognitive development in the same way we normalize differences in their physical growth.
HE: Thank you, Deb! I think a lot of homeschooling parents like me need to hear this reminder. We can all feel such pressure, especially this time of year.
DB: At this point in the year, we’re all aware of our inadequacies. But I believe God allows that so we can then figure out how to call for a greater dependency on the Lord for these decisions and for our children’s lives—God is homeschooling us! So many of the practical questions we all have in this evaluation process are really just symptomatic of God calling us to press in to a deeper sense of His call and provision.
So celebrate! In homeschooling, we are so often aware of where we’re falling short and what’s not working and where our kids are struggling…that we over-emphasize, completely discount or minimize where God IS providing abundantly. Where are your kids THRIVING? Where are they IMPROVING? Where are they MATURING and SUCCEEDING? Celebrate those things in the process.
-
Is It Me? My Child? Or the Curriculum? What to do when homeschooling frustrations abound
Last week we began a series on mid-school year self-evaluations, and how to trouble-shoot your homeschooling frustrations. This week I continue my discussion with Debra Bell, as we look at how to determine if it’s just a bad day, a character issue with your child/children, or simply a child in need of more support.
Is it just a bad day?
Heather Eades: In trouble-shooting issues with your homeschool, last week we talked about what to do when the problem is with you, the homeschooling parent. But what can parents do when they determine that the majority of schooling frustrations appear to be coming from their child?
Deb Bell: When I see frustration in my child, I stop and ask, “Is this child just having a bad attitude today?” Because that is a very real possibility. But we also want to consider the child’s character, because sometimes kids are prone to laziness and don’t enjoy putting out extra effort. However another question to certainly consider is, “Is the child being over-challenged?”
Does the child need extra support?
HE: What should parents do if they feel their child is being over-challenged by specific subjects?
DB: Then we either need to provide more support as a parent or make a change—I’ve found at different times that, even though I’m all about raising independent learners, at times my kids just needed me to sit beside them and help them with that subject on that day.
One of the hardest challenges of being a homeschooling parent is keeping ourselves free from distractions. We have goals for the housework; we’re always multitasking. For me to homeschool with integrity, I had to turn off my phone (at least for the morning.) I tried to frontload the day with our homeschooling, in order for me to be solely focused in the morning on my children’s individual needs.
Does the problem exist outside of schoolwork?
HE: And after you’ve given your child support, what if you suspect a character issue with your child? How does a parent determine this?
DB: My husband had excellent wisdom in this! If I thought I was dealing with a character issue, my husband would always ask, “Well, is it pervasive?” The character issue can be determined as a rule of thumb, I think, by asking yourself, “Does the problem only emerge when my child is doing school, or do I see the problem during other aspects of the child’s life?” If your child doesn’t want to do math…but he also doesn’t want to do anything…it might be a character issue and no curriculum is going to fix that.
HE: So, what is a parent to do with a character issue?
DB: I would start by telling my child what I’m seeing, couching it all with empathy. I remember one time my husband concluded the resistance from one of our kids was really just laziness. We’ve all had those moments when the real reason we don’t get something done is we are being lazy. Fortunately, our child listened to our perspective and asked for help and forgiveness—which we both immediately offered on both counts. We prayed together and asked the Lord to help all of us put more effort into our responsibilities. We need to come along side our kids when they struggle with a character issue or immaturity. Let them see that parents have to resist these temptations as well.
Allow your homeschool to be HolySpirit-led. We need to be asking the Lord, “What is my child ready for? What does he/she need from me? How can I challenge each child appropriately?” As you become more in tune with the Holy Spirit’s leading, you will become more in tune with each child.
Finally, in our next post we look at what to do if it is the curriculum.
-
Setting Up for Success: 3 Keys to A Great Start in Math this Year
Everyone starts a new school year with high hopes and fresh resolve to make it a year of growth and accomplishment. Over the years I’ve seen many math students excel and others struggle to just get by. I’m a firm believer that habits and attitudes play a much bigger role in our accomplishments in the classroom than innate ability. Here are some concrete ways you can increase your odds of a fruitful and joyous year in math.
- Get organized. Have your student set aside a specific shelf for math. It should house their textbook, notebook (not assorted pieces of loose leaf paper), graph paper, calculator, and everything else on those supplies lists. Some of you are thinking really, that’s her first tip? I know, it seems so obvious. Yet, very few high school students take the time to do this. Pick a notebook that can last you for the whole course or at least the semester. I’ve seen students skip over graphing problems because they didn’t want to go searching for graph paper. Print off a nice pile of this graph paper and have it hole punched and ready to go.
- Line up help. I’ve done several posts on math tutors here and here. But the important point is if you know math might be a problem devise a plan ahead of time. Don’t wait until your student has struggled through 20 lessons and they finally admit they’re completely lost. A better approach is to pick an objective measurement. For example, any quiz grade below 70% and there’s going to be a one-hour review session with dad or an older sibling. Agreeing to this ahead of time lowers the stress involved with admitting they need help.
- Be honest about weaknesses and shortcomings. If math didn’t go well last year it might be best to start with some review. Review helps all of us. In 10th and 11th grade I set aside the first six weeks of school to review for the SATs. My main goal was to get a great score and earn a scholarship. But a secondary benefit was that I reviewed lots of basic concepts before jumping into something new. In the end, I made up those 6 weeks because I was able to learn the new material more quickly.
Try these out and let me know how it goes. And if you want to ask about specific concerns or questions find me on Facebook! I love helping homeschool families figure out high school math.
Kathryn Gomes teaches SAT Math for Aim Academy. This post was originally published on her blog kathryngomes.com.
-
The Ultimate Homeschool Planners: Planning to See God at Work
I love homeschool moms. I love their passion, their resourcefulness and love for their families. But now with the luxury of viewing homeschooling through the rear view mirror, I can see a couple of sore spots that contribute to our exhaustion and occasional loss of vision.- We are more aware of our own shortcomings in our homeschool life than we are of God’s activity.
- We feel guilty when our kids work independently of us because our image of a good teacher is one who micro-manages her students.
If there ever was a ploy of the devil in our midst, this is it: Our enemy doesn’t want you to notice God at work. He wants you to keep believing it all depends on you! Secondly, he’d never want your kids to learn independently. That would give them too much motivation and investment in this venture, and he isn’t looking for a successful outcome.
My planners are a small attempt to keep your eyes of faith focused on God and not yourself. Even though you are writing down the nuts and bolts of your academic plan each week, we ask you to first spend time recounting God’s faithfulness and surprising blessings from the week before. We give you a place to list small beginnings, signs of progress, notable achievements and unexpected acts of kindness all under a heading we call “Evidences of Grace,” just so you can remember what the source of these memorable moments s — God’s unmerited favor in your family’s life. We also know from our own homeschooling days your kids are going to look inside your planner to see what you think is worth noting. We want them to find a record of God’s activity as the focal point, not a manmade effort.
Secondary to that ultimate goal, we want to help you raise an independent learner. If you don’t, you aren’t going to finish the course. Dependent students are a key contributor to homeschool burnout. We want you to know the truth about learning: You can’t teach anyone anything. Is that a shocker? Especially from a teacher with thirty-some years of experience under her belt? You can only motivate a student to engage in learning. And learning only results when effort on the student’s part is expended. If your child is staring at you dull-eyed and slack-jawed, go find something better to do with your time. Kids only learn when they are cognitively engaged. The outward signs of that are effort, interest, motivation, and initiative.
Here’s some really good news about that reality: God has hard-wired your kid to learn. That’s right, we are built for learning. We will live longer, and lead happier, healthier lives as long as we keep using our brain to learn. Most of us were schooled under a different system, the powerful model in our mind is a teacher at the front of the room controlling our time, our work, our interests, our learning. The Ultimate Homeschool Planning System ( UHPS) which includes a planner for mom, a planner for students ( 4th-8th) and a planner for teens (7th-12th) is designed to foster and reward independence and initiative while you provide accountability and strategic guidance.
We pray putting our planners in front of you each day will be a gentle reminder of the central and secondary goals of homeschooling: Seeing God’s handiwork in the details of your family life and raising up the next generation trained to seize responsibility and lead their own families according to His plans.
How has God been faithful in your family’s life this past week? Let’s get that down in writing.
